Sometimes life can be beautiful. Take for instance, the makings of a perfect night. Start with the basics: Friday night dinner with old friends... old friend is a college fraternity brother (TEP) ... include our wives...add 45 minutes drive time to their house in M5 cause it's the Beast and always will be...and include blacktop 4 lane highway in the mix (I-695 to I-95N - Baltimore).
Then add Friday night dinner, good conversation, and a great night out. For dessert, add some tired sleepy wife and kids and await the wife's "'time to go home' sub-routine", and load the Beast for home.
For dessert, add the drive home with one serving of M3 that doesn't know anything about a good old fashion arse kicking by his bigger brother. And, for the icing on the cake, recognize the traffic pattern begs for the "2 Step iPod 'M' Series 39 Truck Shuffle"
What is this you ask? Why, it is very simple lads. Let me tell you a story of how you kick an arse on the highway, old school (M3 is my personal experience - substitute AMG or 'vette at your convenience):
1. Drive along minding your own business in mixed light traffic and allow cocky M3 driver to spot you. I say "spot you" because we all know you pulled up to him, as the mothership, to check in.
2. Once he spots you, look at the road ahead, and this is important: Tap the gas only on the que signal - and the que signal is a tractor trailor in Lane 1 that is
ONE MILE ahead. When you see this tractor trailor, hit the gas and get behind it. As an M5 driver, you recognize you will immediately travel 3/4 mile in what appears to be 4 seconds, so allow the M3 to catch up and recover from his head butt.
3. When he takes the bait - and he will, especially if he has the bad arse wing on his trunk - pull ahead and allow him to follow you in Lane 1 with you behind the tractor trailor.
4. STEP 1: Here is the tricky part: While driving behind the truck in Lane 1, watch Lane 2 for the approaching "next fastest" car. This car likely has a lane of trafic following behind it - usually as much as 20 cars - so make your move
wisely to pull this off.
5. STEP 2: WHEN SAFE, but at perfect timing to prevent the M3 from copying your awesome move,
SWITCH TO LANE 2,
FLOOR IT. and
HAUL ARSE.
6. Your baited M3 is now stuck behind the tractor trailor and cannot switch lanes because of the traffic in Lane 2. With your brand new and clear 1 mile 4 lane highway ahead of you, frequently glance at your rear view mirrow and admire your work. After 3/4 mile when it is clear you won, slow down and cruise at 60, chill out, and adjust your iPod for your favorite tune (of course plugged into your AUX input), crank the volume, and then realize your wife is sleeping and you did not get caught.
7. Add that you did this at age 39 and the M3 guy was likely in his twenties, and you just pulled off the "2 Step iPod "M" Series 39 Truck Shuffle"
Drive Smart.
ACH
///M5
Webmaster 
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