Living the Dream

100%Cocoa · 3rd June 2010, 00:34

If you're on this board, chances are, you own an M5. Either that, or you'd really love to own an M5. I count myself amoungst the very fortunate, honoured even, to posses such an amazing car. To me, the M5 embodies a dream. For the last 5 years, every time I looked at ABO, or got in her to drive somewhere dull, I was always thinkng in the back of my mind, that I'd rather be hooning her down a beautiful mountain road

, bathed in hot sunshine, overlooking the Meditteranean sea, a beautiful lady by my side

, and the roof open to enjoy that glorious V8 every time I red lined her through yet another tunnel.

I've been lucky enough to drive a lot in the summer in Europe, and on some stunning roads, but never in something like the M5. I have managed to take her on a couple of runs across Europe, but so far, only in the winter, or on some tight schedule, or with a smelly old mate next to me who insists on taking hs shoes off. So far then, only bits of the dream. Teasers. Little tasters of what could be

. I figured the dream would remain just a dream, until my fantastic fianceé started to plan our honeymoon. To my amazment, she took me seriously when I tentatively suggested we do a road trip in the M5. The trip was ON, and the dream was about to become a reality!

The Mrs planned the route a month or so before we went. She worked on a maximum of 400 miles in any one day, as on the continent, this equates to less than 5 hours driving, so you still get plenty of time to lie in, and arrive in time to see the place and relax before dinner. We wanted to end up in the far south of Sardinia for a few days of doing NOTHING, but we also wanted a little adventure on the way there and on the way back.

Those that know ABO will know that, by refusing to be driven slowly and always demanding that I spank her harder

, she'd got herself into quite a sorry state. If we were going to swan around Europe looking gorgeous, she needed to look a little more like an M5, and a little less like a skip.
A serious refresh was required, so I had a front end respray, a leather refurb and had all 4 wheels given the Tiago treatment. I had the valve cover gaskets done, a new seat cushion fitted, (you gotta be comfortable!) and I even treated her to a new map DVD and an AlphaN install just for good measure. After a final wash and polish, and a once over by Phil Crouch & his sidekick Graham, she was finally ready for action.

So here is a brief summary of where ABO took us, and what happened along the way......

We left the UK on the 8am ferry from Dover to Calais, and set the nav for a little village in Bourgognes where we would spend the first night drinking fabulous wine and eating some proper tasty food. Once we'd escaped Calais, I did what I always do, and set the autopilot to 120mph, and sat back and enjoyed the ride. After about 30 minutes, I was waxing lyrical to the new Mrs about how amazing these French Autoroutes are, and how you never see any Police on them, when she interupted me and pointed to a blue Citroën pulling out of a side road with lots of blue flashing lights, and 3 Policemen in it, all pointing at me and waving a lot. Bugger.

First time I've EVER been stopped speeding in over 5 years of M5 ownership!

So I pulled over, was very polite and asked what the trouble seemed to be? He showed me a radar gun which said 212 on it. I asked what this meant and he said it was Km/Hr and I had to pay a fine

. Sh!t the bed, this was going to be EXPENSIVE. He told me to follow him to the nearest cashpoint. When we got there, I asked how much it would be, and he said "ninety Euro".

I had to ask him to repeat himself as I could not believe I had heard right. Nope, sure enough, it was just 90 Euros. Happy days! 5 minutes later, I'd paid my fine in cash, got my official receipt, and was chatting away about how great our wedding had been, how cold it was in France compared to Brazil (where the Mrs is from) and taking some pics of the men in uniform! I love France even more than ever now. You'd go to prison for doing that speed in the UK!

So later that afternoon, with nothing more serious to worry about than the "Chicken Supreme" Panini not being available at the services

, we arrived at our first stop over....

And stopped off near the Chateaux to sample the local produce...

Next morning, we set off for the run across the Alps into Italy, and on to the port of Genova to catch the Sardinia ferry. The scenery rapidly changed from open farmland to mountainous views, and provided endless tunnels to play the Tubi-Style symphony in.....

Suddenly, Mt Blanc looms into view and startes to dominate the skyline....

Then, after twisting up a seemingly endless mountain road, you get to a toll booth, pay your 35 Euros, and then it's dark and straight for the next 7.25 miles...

Just as you're about to go into a trance from the endless repetative orange lights passing over your head, like an cheesy dance track video, boom - it's daylight again, and the mountains seema whole lot bigger all of a sudden!

On the Italian side now, you drop at a much faster rate than the climb on the French side, and seemingly moments later, you pop out of yet another tunnel on the most glorious stretch of Autostrada I have yet driven.....

Seconds after the Mrs took this picture, a silver S8 on Italian plates, flew past me so fast that ABO shook in its wake. Aha! Playtime! I dropped her into 4th and gave chase. There was not a single car in sight, other than the rapidly disappearing S8. I wound ABO up to 175mph and caught up slowly. As I got onto his tail, he saw me and sped up. Next thing, he's got the S8 up to 165 and we're snaking down the mountain in one very Italian style convoy! After a few more bends though, I confess to conceding to the Audi. He was just taking corners way too quick for those speeds and my sanity. The Mrs was on Polizia Stradale alert too so we eased off and let him go.
I stuck the auto pilot on again and we eased across Piedmont, and an hour or so later, we were in Genova to meet the overnight ferry. Next stop Sardinia!

But first, we wave goodbye to Mainland Italy....

The ferry is an overnight, so next morning when we arrived, we set the nav for the hotel, via the Gennargentu National Park, and off we went. We'd decided to follow the coast as much as possible, and the mountains when not. About mid morning, we stumbled across a stunning, and completely empty beach. After a quick play in the sand, we tried to get ourselves back on route. Unfortunately, it seems that Sardinia is not so well mapped by BMW! This is the main road the Nav took us up.....

But soon enough, the promised beautiful roads and stunning scenery appear as if by magic....

And again....

And again.....

Until you get back to the coast, and that magical Mediterranean blue sea

And eventually the hotel, for a well earned drink!

And a rest on the beach with the Mrs....

After 5 days of heaven, it's back on the road, and a different route back to Olbia for the ferry. It turns out that all roads in Sardinia are pretty picturesque....!

Cueing up for the Moby Ferry is somewhat more pleasant than being at Dover too!

Next morning, we hammered across northern Italy once more, on the ludicrously straight and empty Roman Roads that are nowadays the Autostrada. It is an almost sureal experience as the Alps in the distance never seem to get any closer, whilst the road underneath you slides past at an M5 pace....

Got to love those crazy Italians!

Suddenly, you're in the mountains once more, but this time, we're heading towards Switzerland. At this point we had one of the very few disappointments of the trip. It has long been a dream of mine to drive over the Grand St Bernard Pass,(in lieu of the Stelvio obviously), and we were all set to do it this day. At the petrol station above, the attendants told us that it was not possible as it was closed due to excessive snow. It was 28 degrees Celcius as they told us this, and it seemed barely believable, but true it was, and so we headed for the Grand St Bernard Tunnel instead...

Mind you - the roads up to the tunnel weren't to shabby!

And when you pop out the other side in Switzerland, you're in for a proper treat

About 40 minutes later, after marveling at the OCD perfect Swiss roads.... (and houses, and log piles, and road signs, and pilons, and basically everything! Tiago - this place was made for you mate!.....) we arrived in Montreaux on Lake Geneva, and our jaws hit the floor as we stepped onto the balcony of the hotel...

I parked up ABO for the night and hired another vehicle for the afternoon.....

The view was great

And next morning, for the first time on the trip, Mt Blanc revealed herself in all her glory....

And after a hearty Swiss breakfast, I fired up ABO and headed for the mighty AUTOBAHN

We started with a gentle cruise.....

But I soon got carried away and couldn't resist pressing the pedal just a little harder....

I hasten to add that I did get her up to the dot between 170 & 180, but it's difficult to maintain that with traffic, and the Mrs kept missing the moment with the camera. I'm happy settling for this pic though....

Around 5pm, we got to a very special place for ABO. It's where she was conceived... (she blushed when I told her, bless!)

And then I took her to her favourite place, for a little fun before bedtime...

I have to say - this weekday evening session thing is brilliant too! There was hardly a soul on the track. I even managed 2 whole laps without a single other person getting in my way. No more weekend trips me thinks!

I'll just finish with a shot of my all time favourite UK plate, (bearing in mind how little you can actually do with UK plates for personal ones)

If you own an M5, and you haven't taken her for a session on the continent DO IT NOW. This is what your car was built for, and you will love every second of it. Even my lovely lady was impressed by how much she enjoyed even the longer road sections. The car is just completely in its element out here. She switches from monster motorway mileage eater, to svelt backroad blaster in the blink of an eye, and everywhere you take her, from French Vinyard workers ("oh! Regarde! Em Cinque, Em Cinque!!!") to Italian mountian cafes (eeh! Em Cinque!) people stop and stare, and make nice comments. There can't be many 10 year old 4 door saloons that could command this much respect across the continent?!
On top of all that, you're on holiday, but you have a bit of your home with you. No queues, no lost luggage, no problem buying MORE souveniers, or clothes - you just pile it into the car. Then, when you arrive at your stop-overs, you have the best wheels in the hotel to explore the local area with. No tin pot super-mini hire car to hate - you have an all singing all dancing M5 to play with. This is surely the only way to have a holiday!

One last thing - I knew I'd married the right woman anyway, but this was only emphasised, when, after a few laps of the ring, she asked if perhaps we could stay in Adenau for another night becuse she was enjoying it so much. Not sure who I love more now!

Cheers for taking the time to share my fun!
Barney.

v-man · 3rd June 2010, 00:41

Awesome!

Torquey5 · 3rd June 2010, 00:48

Love the brown driving gloves!

M5 London · 3rd June 2010, 01:30

If Carlsberg did M5Board posts............

Great read mate. Thanks for sharing your experiences !!

Well done ABO !

Chadderz2010 · 3rd June 2010, 02:08

Pure win

fantastic and inspiring post, sounds like you had a great time.

Thanks for sharing.

Chad

Blue Thunder · 3rd June 2010, 02:16

Nice report!

Pika101 · 3rd June 2010, 02:28

Excellent writeup, and what a great trip! I've wanted to drive across / around Europe ever since I got my old E36, and the M5 has only served to increase that.